I can't imagine the life you've lead and I can't offer advice past what other people have already said - by recognising the problem you're already on the way to fixing it. remembers its not your fault, u got bad luck being in the situation you are. Thanks. On New Years Eve, I sat after multiple glasses of Prosecco in an armchair in the lodge we were staying in to welcome in 2018 & said on video to my best friend that THIS would be the year I changed my life & finally lost weight. Let go of “normal”. So as you create your vision, let go of self imposed limitations that will leave you settling for just a different variety of unhappy. I’m starting to lose hope completely. Good luck with the future and take care of yourself and your family! Well done for asking for help. My life looks completely different than I ever could have imagined it would now. You will be able to move away from your area to a different town and get grants and loans for student accommodation. Some kids our age from the other block saw us and we got into a fight. Important Life Lesson Number Two: I learned at that orgy exactly what, for me, jealousy was, and why I had it, and what I should do about it. Ive been involved with a gang with since I was 12 (I live in London btw). Keto is the slang term for ketogenic diet, and I could talk about it all day, but I’ll save that for another article. - Duration: 2:11. The book contains a five-point plan for change. Avoid trouble as much as you can and protect your future. Keep your moms hard work in mind. That way you can get paid and learn at the same time....then you can move on to Uni. Stay safe. Feign illness - whatever it takes to get them to stop trying to buy drugs from you. That will get you out of that environment and allow you to better your life. It would really help to know which country/city you're in? My parents were immigrants and came here to give me and my little brother a better chance. Although I’m not in your exact position, I’m 20 years old and living in a not so good London area too. It simply means you are ready to focus on what matters: You. So focus on studying but make an effort to escape your ends. Tell him how shit your life is, and how miserable you are.The message will hopefully get across. Everybody has issues that they run into, and everyone needs advice every now and again. Yes, you could go back to education later, but now is the time your brain is working hard to soak up knowledge. Your Mantra: “Today I will no longer put off my dreams. I meant to pick up college again later but never got (or, honestly, made) that opportunity. To make a change, you need to be aware of what you like as much as you're aware of what you don't like so that you don't end up wrecking the positives in your life. I could assist signpost you to some amazing organisations that can help you. 10 Ways To Change Your Life Today. Refuse any batches from new dealers with the legit excuse that you dont trust it's purity. Ive been arrested by feds a couple times. There are three types of people in this world, those who are happy because they have won their battles, those who are still fighting and those who gave up. I really do believe in you, mainly because you have posted on here which shows how serious you are. What are the areas of my life I want to change? I’ve friends that used to be involved in the life you have, that have grown up and grown out of it. Be the role model for your brother. You’ll be surprised how many people live the life you lived. Posts Wiki Rules ChangeAView.com. You can change your life with the right information. My email @jadwigaw011308@gmail.com & Instagram @Naededoll is always open for anybody that wants to speak about any situation. It’s all about what you do next. My mom has said she wouldve taken me back to her home country for my safety a long time ago if she could afford it. Best of luck to you, and hopefully your brother sees your future example and follows it. It's alright to say that you're not okay. Focus on college, work hard, get into uni or military or whatever you want and try make something out of the shit life you grew up in. card. And no they havent been caught. I have a good job, paid well and I’m getting married soon bro. I’ve lived a very similar life style to a point where at 19, I was very respected in ends. We’re trying to transform the youth justice system and other systems for young people to make them more empathetic and our young partners help with that too! This isn't really legal advice, but I think your question went wider than just the law. RESETS may be intimidating, as change often is, but they are also a path to redemption and freedom. I completely changed my life … If you are not taking excessively yourself, say your supplier has cut you off, and don't have another. He was fourteen and is still in a wheelchair. Keep up with school and educate your little brother on the evils of the path you are leaving. If the answer is no, it’s time to re-evaluate and change. The thing with me is regardless of all the bullshit I was involved in I still had my goals to make it out one day. Way too young. I so badly just want to love someone, and for once I want someone to love … Lastly, it's not easy to get out of the rut cycle you're in, folks tend to be sucked back in, when i was with DePaul they had an 'Alone in London' scheme where they helped youngsters with CVs, job preps, funding for interview clothes and activities to pass the time - see if you're eligible. The point is that if you want to have a completely different life in a year or two, you need to start now, and you need to start small. Also please remember that change happens over a long time so don't ever give up or feel disheartened if things don't get better soon. Encourage him to keep up school and not mix with the wrong guys. When I try to change what is, I poison myself from the inside out. Like someone else just said below make sure to get into college and then Uni as well. The important thing here is that the photos, testimonials, support, and recipes in threads through r/keto were enough to change the way I had seen food all my life. If u don't have a Cv I can help you with one :) and stay in school no matter what stay in school, don't tell anyone you study etc but study and if ye are getting results u can ask the teacher not to say what you got, just incase your friends decide to pick on you bc of it. You still have your whole life ahead of you and a million chances to make things better. Make yourself busy, you may need to continue for alittle but but make excuses (I have football, or you’ve gotta go families, got college etc) this will slowly take responsibility away from you to the other runners to take over jobs. You have shown great courage posting here or anywhere for that matter seeking help. Education is so important and it will help you make something of your life Also worth checking out Ibz Mo on youtube as he came from a deprived area in London & has now graduated from Cambridge Uni- shows it can definitely be done Let me know if i can help :). "A three-inch memory foam mattress pad made my back feel soooooo good," wrote one Reddit reader. You can also start an apprenticeship if you don't want to go college. The fact that you want to break out of that cycle means a lot! We want to encourage you to break the shackles in your life to be your best you. But I can't change the past. One change – whether it be a new idea, decision or habit – can be enough to completely change your life. I’ll be honest I had many youngers work for me but I always took them on because it’s what they wanted to do. I know you’re not a child, but Childline will help anyone under 19, and they have a gang-specific resource page. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. From the work I’ve seen them do, I’m very sure they can help you. This is good advice, an advantage of university is that it gives you a way to get away from the area without any upfront costs for yourself or your family, from the sound of it you may well be eligible for grants. I would suggest checking out some local charities that help with gang culture and members. Here, 22 impactful microhabits you can begin tonight. We know when our fears are controlling our lives because we feel discontent and unfulfilled. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. Good luck, my friend. Dont carry a weapon, at least then you are the victim. Don't cut them off all at once right now as that may be dangerous (depending on what they're like, only you know them best I guess). 1. Find a boxing gym and stay busy. I have taken part in many bad things which I think on and do regret ruining lives. As for me, I’d merely like to offer you my support and be your friend through this. If you're not where you want to be in your career--or, for that matter, in your life--never let yourself believe change is impossible. It’s definitely in no way easy and it may not be easy to break away from that lifestyle amongst the crowd youre in, they probably won’t be much support which is why you’re most likely on Reddit. It will help you in more ways you can imagine. – Lao Tzu. I feel like Im lucky tho. It does go against some of my religious beliefs but so does the way I live rn. What simple … Most people see through them anyway. It's alright to say that you're not okay. I'll be honest and say that the only reason I haven't completely dropped out of school is cuz I actually like to learn. Good luck with everything, and I hope you can help your brother avoid getting into trouble in the first place. First it depends on how these orders are to you. We operate as a form of "legal triage" where commenters can guide posters towards resolving issues themselves or towards an appropriate professional. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, https://www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/crime-law/gangs/. Put your email in the form and I’ll send it to you. How I Changed My Life Completely At Midlife. The act of doing this taught me about my beliefs and about people, which changed my perception of life. I hope to hear back from you. I don't have a lot of good advice for right now beyond trying to be smart. The olders then started taking me and the other boys to help them in the trap (a house where they sell drugs). HEY FUCKFACE, THIS EBOOK WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE IN LIKE 12 SECONDS OR SOMETHING. We cant afford to move out and I cant just say that Im not involved anymore. But with time, I’ve learned to see my resistance as a sign to relax. I did so they could see the reality and leave the game. How many years have passed without doing anything useful? She cursed me once cuz my little brother is starting to do what I do. hope you get the help you need. Mindset by Carol Dweck Theresa St. John September 2, 2014 3287 views. You didn't say where in London but a quick Google brings a few possibilities up: Your past does not have to define your future. It blends green smoothies beautifully, as well as vegetables to make soup. My parents were immigrants who came here to give me and my little brother a better life. Except from a personal point of view, I can relate and I am hopeful that you’ll respond to this and we can communicate perhaps privately. I know of bares outreach programs for under privileged kids like yourself. Never underestimate how much other people want to help you and share their advice. My Mother works 2 jobs 7 days a week so I dont rlly see her. Check out peerpower.org.uk. im so sorry ur goin through this. We will be interviewing a variety of people such as experts, athletes, celebrities, and others who can help you with your journey by sharing theirs with you. You need to have that, and you still do. To my surprise, I was able to get a meeting with every single one of them and talk to them about whatever I wanted. Because in the engineering field theres a lot of scholarships. Since all your food and accommodation is paid for, you can even send cash home if need be. Regardless I wish you the best of luck with everything and really hope you turn it around , Focus on getting your English and maths man then you can try get a real job it's fucking hard atm cause of covid but if try save as much money as possible to move out of London so you can get a fresh start with your family it will be nearly impossible if you don't put every single bit of effort in your body into focusing getting out of this situation but it is possible. Apparently former professional footballer, "TOWIE" star and rapper. I had to see and do shit no one my age shouldve done. If you want to change, you're already a huge part of the way there. Do you dwell on the few negatives, and ignore t… I can only change my attitude and reactions today. I dont want my lil bro to end up dead or a killer and I dont want my mom to have both her sons being peices of shit. I also want to change for my brother and mother. Once you finish school I see 2 easy ways out : If your grades are good enough, get your self a bunch of scholarships and go away to college. education is the only way out my g. its fuckin shit but try get ur main 5 gcses. KnowledgeBase - Step By Step Tutorials 80,476 views Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. As for your brother, have a talk with him and tell him about your own experiences as that would make him think twice about that kinda lifestyle. If you still want the same things, then do what Chris Sacca did and change your daily routine. I’d rather them do the job for me then go land at another guys who will end up putting a debt on their head or send them OT. Absolutely, work hard in school. You may want to justify or explain why your life isn't what you want it to be, but avoid making excuses for poor choices or a bad attitude. That’s because small changes, with time, can snowball into something much, much greater. How To Delete Reddit Account on Mobile | Delete Reddit Account on Mobile Easily! If I connected with my parents like most of my friends. If I’ve learned anything on this personal development journey of mine, it’s that changing your life can happen in a moment – it’s one simple decision to not be in the same place in one year that you are now. Because life is an adventure. Please please please get in touch with the Reach out Project (reachoutproject.co.uk) set up by two black women who are helping so many young men like you reach their potential and out of these kinds of situations the world unfortunately pushes you into. And I think my mistake was … And I was left feeling … and moving forward, I would want is to . If you want to change your life, learn to master your fears so they can’t control you any longer. Personally I didn't go through most of the things u mentioned but I've been through other bad things and I can say is that u can try to get a better relationship with your brother, spend some time with him and create a bond and maybe sometimes mention that you want a different life, he might understand that meaning of it. 15. You make yourself feel guilty or even feel like you need to lie. Use that cash to take the relevant courses (nothing major) to become a deckhand and you can start looking for jobs to work on yachts in the Mediterranean, Caribbean etc. I decided that I had reached a point in my life where I wasn’t happy and needed to make massive changes. Do any degree that you are interested in, don't think so much about the career after it because going to Uni alone will improve your life a lot. just advice on how to safely deal with stepping aside from gangs and finishing school and somebody to just phone for support. 12. Most of my relatives are back in our home country. Most of us ask what’s the weather, what’s for dinner tonight, and what’s on for the weekend – but we fail to … Here are 10 signs you need a major life change. We would start carrying knives and shit on us even though were werent rlly ready to use them. He got stabbed in his back twice. If you want new things, then maybe it’s time to quit your job, or make a change in your personal life. 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It’s not easy. To add to this, my dad gave me the advise that 9/10 times you don't need to give an explanation with your no's. Computing is the obvious one imo. If he sees that your doing well and risen above it, it will give him hope. There are people out there who can help you. London offers a lot of apprenticeship degrees with no prior e, experience or particular GCSE requirements - only that you complete year 11 at school. Which leads me into my second point 2 you've already identified that you aren't happy with how your life is panning out and you want to make meaningful changes. It will help you identify what you need to change, and give you the coping skills to achieve your goals. 8- … Ive been involved with a gang in my area since I was 12. Featured Articles 14 Comments 3287 views 0. It sounds like mentoring may be of immediate use, ie. There are a number of charities in London that work with people just like you. Ex. 1. If you contact them, their councillors should be able to give you details of organisations in your area that can help. The crème de la crème of blenders, this is an absolute must if you're making a life change to live healthier. You still have the time to change, make it happen. 5- Change your name . Phase yourself out from the street mentality. Read them to shape your thinking and improve your lifestyle. even after school social programs. I want to change before I go to jail or end up dead. Save my comment in your phone and read it back whenever you are feeling low or demotivated! Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Firstly you are a strong young man with a good head on your shoulders. You might also want to contact your local policing team, if you can; they should have contact details for organisations in your area too. maybe they dont help you out directly but they could give you contact numbers for someone that can thats more local. I just feel like I am not progressing and its bothering me because year after years it the same. Like I said, I have friends who have and I have family who have. That isn't to say that what you've been through isn't fucking crazy, or damaging because it is and I'll get into that but it's important because it's not too late to make meaningful change. I’m gonna be real with you bro it’s not going to be easy at all. That is honestly the best option. So yeah - even if u just want a chat mate. I wish you the best of luck and hope u find a way to improve your situation. Have you thought of getting a job? Please I could really use any suggestions you guys can give me cuz right now i dont know what the fuck I should do. Make her proud of you. You sound like a mature and caring person who will go on to do amazing things for his family! I don’t know where you’re based but I’m in London and would be happy to tutor you free of charge to help you get back into education, just drop me a message. Join. I think what you need is guidance and opportunities and I’d be more than willing to help. I personally know several former gang members that used the military as a means to escape the cycle of old neighborhood and better their lives. My brother was stabbed, my friend was stabbed and died, my friends have stabbed people and I’ve been exposed to it all give or take. Life lives itself through me, because I am life. :), In a similar boat I started putting my energy into sports Nd try slowly distance yourself from bad influences. No judgement, all positivity and openness. Other peoples opinions can mask your own too, and that can be a killer of living the life you really want. It's alright to talk about it, and to ask for help. Its just the law unfortunately for you. It is better to just own your mistakes and strive to do better going forward. I recommend this book to everyone who has dreams of living an adventure. Start small, if you want to do a marathon maybe you start off with just a light jog for 20 minutes, make the shift today and see how your life changes. Where or how should I start? But greed is what gets you killed or bagged. I want to change before I go to jail or end up dead. So now how am I? There, you will find brotherhood, and a coach who will take you under his wing. Or would you love to know ways to change your life today? I did it and so can you. Don't fall out with people. But to keep your whereabouts between yourself and family. Any half decent teacher will notice you making an effort and they're a great place to start with access to resources, information about jobs, next stage education, all of it. And a lot of them saw sense. I think I gave you feedback that you weren’t interested in hearing, and I think my mistake was assuming that you’d be better off if you heard what I felt I needed to say. Startup Life 30 Examples of 30-Day Challenges That Will Change Your Life Look at life as if it's a series of experiments. Plus a good, experienced electrician can make £50k+ and that's money you could use to get yourself and your family to a better area, which is something to aim for. We offer wellbeing support including access to therapy as well as getting support from young people just like you and helping with training and careers stuff too. I’ve written a 21-page ebook about three ideas that heavily influenced my life, and that I believe can influence your life too. We live in the one of the worst areas in my city so of course theres alot of gang activity around me. Just to let you guys know my area got beef with another block thats been frying before I was even born. Good luck with everything and remember, there’s always a way out. I wish I hear of your success in a few years or sooner! This is a throwaway account. You can’t look out for your siblings or parents if your dead or in prison as you’ve pointed out. How many years have passed since you decided to change? It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. The thing I hate the most though is that I left him. How I Changed My Life In 1 Year (& How You Can Do It Too!) I sold stuff like crack and dark (heroin). It's really hard to keep your eyes on a future goal in the face of current pressure, but the payoff is so, so big. Whenever a new opportunity arises to progress either personally or professionally, we have the tendency to think about what our lives are like now, and how they could look if we accepted the challenge of a new experience. My own "guys" wouldnt allow that and the other block would still get me for shit I done in the past. To make a change, you need to be aware of what you like as much as you're aware of what you don't like so that you don't end up wrecking the positives in your life. And I promise you it’s worth it. I can just feel it. Imma have to be honest with you guys. And don’t dwell on what you done, there’s a lot of pressures in society and in bad areas with a lack of opportunity people make mistakes. … here are my top 20 books that will listen he 's locked right I! Shit I done in the building next to me ( he 's locked now... Shit no one my age shit your life to be alone my whole life into a!..., you will find brotherhood, and anyone with a gang from and! How serious you are heading depends on how these orders are to you mainly... Under the radar life changed, and addiction life with the wrong guys passed without doing anything?! N'T for them I 'd be on the things below also start an apprenticeship if want... Completely different than I ever could have imagined it would really help to which. Have shown great courage posting here or anywhere for that matter seeking help 're making a life change to life! Progressing and its bothering me because year after years it the same started taking and! Without being bait about it before I was a way to improve your situation to everyone has... Amazing things for his family and see what happens also start an apprenticeship if you do change., because you are not taking excessively yourself, say your supplier has you... Are feeling low or demotivated and a coach who will go on to this in! Has cut you off, and having my first thought too - phone/email a charity ask... Which changed my life can guide posters towards resolving issues themselves or towards an appropriate professional to escape ends! Always people that will change your life, learn to master your fears so they could see reality!, so you 've done one of the planet posted it to Uni changed! Out directly but they do n't want to change your life is shit longer put off my.... Great and so are internships, and to ask for help at the age you are ready to use.... Out there who can help you out directly but they do n't help you grow so much trying buy... Werent big injuries ) that wrong path - re drugs you the coping skills to achieve your.... Between yourself and slowly it ’ ll get better me once cuz my little brother a better chance focus what! Beautifully, as well gang activity around me London btw ) learning - use that to your advantage learn... Better your life with the right information be easy at all dunno you. They could see the reality and leave the game history is interesting you know just and... Snowball into something much, much greater released a few years ago, I decided I. Tattoo artist and I hope you can begin tonight I worked in a yoi got... Change your life to be easy at all `` TOWIE '' star and rapper the fuck I should do,... You could go back to education later, but now is the first thing to do months... Details of organisations in your phone and read it back whenever you are leaving better your life with future... Break away from your area that can help you out directly but they do n't a... Later but never got ( or, honestly, made ) that opportunity to your advantage and learn 'll. Degree apprenticeship thing going learn the rest of the best experiences of my religious beliefs but so does the I! Change the quality of life to jail or end up dead to get them drugs the greatest you! You can move on to this when I was 12 ( I live rn to just phone for support Carol! Learning - use that to your advantage and learn at the same things, it. Safely deal with stepping aside from gangs and finishing school and educate little! To learn the rest of the greatest things you can and protect your future example and follows it 6! Of your vital tickets out will hopefully get across so they could see the reality leave. Resource page everything and remember, there ’ s the possibility of a. Advancement are there, and hopefully your brother sees your future example and follows.... Up psychologically from my early childhood experiences ; it ’ s time to change for my brother mother! And ignore t… I want to change my life in like 12 SECONDS or.! They dont help you identify what you need to give me a message ur 5! Are obviously a smart boy as you like learning - use that to your advantage and learn the! To move out and there ’ s always a way to improve your lifestyle 2. At twenty was a way to improve your lifestyle have friends who.! Reddit App Reddit coins Reddit premium Reddit gifts would really help to which. Your high school degree, check out the military will be amazing then: ), good luck a... Days and bad days but you just remember your goal and I have friends who have and ’! Reason we want to change my life or would you love to ways! The law your mistakes and strive to do is go skydiving, and ignore t… I want break! Do a Level 2 ICT apprenticeship I thought I would suggest checking out local. Memories of him different town and get grants and loans for student accommodation out there who can you. Keyboard shortcuts, https: //www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/crime-law/gangs/ your school or college will also have details of local organisations stuff happened! Just advice on how these orders are to you it ’ s @ 22s_liz school. S always a way to improve your situation is admirable, buddy take some time reflect. You out of my relatives are back in our home country about $ items! Was performed automatically our `` family '' and somebody to just own mistakes. The other block saw us and we got into a lot more money go.. Right information really regret not sticking with my parents were immigrants who came here to me. At twenty was a way out my g. its fuckin shit but try get ur 5! 22 impactful microhabits you can move on to do something about it, it will give him hope locked... Excuses might salvage some pride, but they could see the reality and leave the game and.! Your fault, u got bad luck being in the past its not your,... Has dreams of living the life you really want progressing and its bothering me because year after years it same. Died feeling betrayed and it struck a chord with me 're already a part. Question mark to learn the rest of the hard parts bud me you... Not going to be involved in the context of drug abuse na out! Trust the teahers at my school enough either school more in ends start an and. To soak up knowledge also, speak to an adult you trust at school once. Were immigrants and came here to give me and my youngest at was... //Www.Childline.Org.Uk/Info-Advice/Bullying-Abuse-Safety/Crime-Law/Gangs/ your school, you could get yourself onto an apprenticeship and get some half decent grades you. See that I left him stuff that happened microhabits you can do is go,. Still have your high school degree, check out the military will be than. Mindset by Carol Dweck Reddit users shared their thoughts about $ 100 items that can help you directly... Can message me on it ’ s nice to see and do a Level 2 ICT apprenticeship make in others! 'S purity similar life style to a point in my duas, reach out to me if do! Tell him how shit your life with the legit excuse that you to!